The energy around
here has been kind of weird today. It’s
like I slipped into another dimension, as it seems to be particularly hard to
relate to my surroundings. It could also be the weather or the recent solar
flares. I suspect that there is
something bigger than just my stuff happening.
It all started 2 days
ago on Friday. I attended a pot luck
luncheon given for the ladies that I work out with and who are in my Zumba
class. Our Zumba teacher also works as a
social director at one of the local nursing homes, and she was going to bring
one of the residents who was living at the facility because of her dementia. I was shocked when they came through the door,
as I knew that lady with the dementia. It
had been several months since I had seen her at Zumba class, and I also
remembered her from my ballroom dancing classes. Apparently, her dementia had gotten worse
very rapidly. I said hello, and I think
that I got her standard response of “I know you from somewhere”. None of the elders on either side of my
family had ever gotten Alzheimer’s or dementia.
They all went to the grave with their wits intact. So this episode kind of threw me off.
Then yesterday, I
got a notice in the mail that one of our local non-profit organizations, the
Cortez Cultural Center, was closing its doors because of the increasing
financial difficulty that it had been having for the past several years. It was such a hopeless situation that they
were also being forced to sell the very historical building that they had occupied
for almost 30 years. This facility had
provided programs on archeology, art exhibits for local artists, a kids camp in
the summer, and our annual birding festival, to name a few of the
activities. This is also where I had
been renting space for the QSH workshops and had used the facility many times in
the past for evening workshops and shamanic trainings. Closing the facility will be a huge loss for the
community.
So I sat down to get
to the root of my melancholy feelings of the day. Loss seems to be the theme. I am sad about the loss of the mental
faculties of my acquaintance from the nursing home, and sad for the loss of a
great cultural institution. Sad that I
will never have the interactions with both that I had in the past. Something has been taken away. Other losses in my life have come up, and there
is a grieving process underway.
There is also a
sadness for what humanity has lost and for the many losses that we will
inevitably be facing in the near future.
We are reaching a crisis point and most will not emerge unscathed. It will be up to each to resolve with their
life so far and the losses that they have endured and will be enduring in the
future.
Perhaps what I am feeling
is also due to some planetary or cosmic forces affecting our planet. I hope so, as it will eventually shift. In the mean time, I bought myself a lobster
tail to fix for dinner. Maybe that will
pull me out of my funk.